scrabbled by james at 1:53 AM  
yeah. so today I was watching bjork videos off of her website. she has a good deal of them that I haven't seen or heard about, but damn she has some neat videos anyway. saw for the first time the video for pagan poetry, which I thought was very well done, though a bit surprising in a way and not at the same time. bachelorette is easily one of my favourites, though. bjork is such a majestic gorgeous woman with a brilliant way of approaching things. everything is with wonder with her; life is art.

'working' on a painting due tomorrow. I think I'm essentially finished it; I don't think I can really be bothered to work on it more. eh. something.

I haven't seen my friends as much over the past few days; I've been ... working, I guess. though I couldn't say on what. I just seem to have not been seeing them as much. maybe I'm crazy or something. whooooo woo woo woo etc.

people I know passing by in the hallway. hello there helen! things!
I am a productive individual.

I had something I was going to say a moment ago, I'm sure... I can't think of what, though.
hm. I just remembered that I haven't worked on my story I'm writing in a few days... I was originally going to say 'a while' but a few days isn't really a while. my preception of time is skewered.

going to have a shower in the near future. showers make you shiny.

I need to be more productive with my time-based art thing.
get going, james!
jeesh.

I yams a good persons. yay fur jamse! yeay ofr jeams!
incoherence. abble-jam.

snicker-snack. (speaking of which, I have a three-way translation of that in a book (the first one mentioned on this page). it's a rather amusing and interesting book, really.)

I am filled to the brim with geekitude.*

yay james! you are the coolest person ever! oh yeah!
I don't need sycophants, I've got myself. yeah!

so yeah. I feel like I need to put more space between the bottom of this and the asterisk above so that the link on it makes more of a difference.
so I'm going to type a bit randomly right now.
random typing.

maybe I should have that shower soon. or go to bed or something.
ooo, I could set up 'my alarm clock' which I 'liberated' from the common room... that way I won't miss my classes again due to djordje changing it without my knowledge...
whee.

so yeah.

and I think I'm probably in the range of 'approaching finished writing in here'. so yeah. I'm going to stop now.

yeah? just watch me.

---

*note: geekitude is not necessarily a bad thing.

scrabbled by james at 10:22 PM  
talking to peoples via el icq. too many people at once can be a problem.

went downtown today to develop some film to slides; that plan didn't pan out. evidentally there's a specific type of film for slides, which is news to me. so if I had my film developed, it would have been all mutated colours. did a one-hour photo job instead, which I also wasn't too pleased with. they printed it on the wrong type of paper, and didn't do the colours too nicely. so my project that these were for is screwed, a bit. I'll have to see what I can work out.

on the other hand, the audio for my project is pretty amusing, I think. I like my little samples that I took from various websites; you can find some amusing thins with google.

my trip downtown wasn't a total loss, though; I got some New CDs! whoo! bossanova by the pixies, confusion is sex/kill yr idols by sonic youth, relative ways/homage ep by ...and you will know us by the trail of dead, and i hate you: a brief history of punk compilation with old and good stuff on it, as opposed to the tripe that is called 'punk' today. listening to the stuff on that one, I can hear so many other genres mixed in with it... hm.

yeah. I'm going to stop now. I don't feel like writing.

scrabbled by james at 6:14 AM  
bryanna sarina and roxanne have left for montreal for the weekend
i guess it's up to me to entertain myself primarily this weekend.

awake all night with friends, so that they could be awake to catch the bus this morning. with adi and stephen as well. stephen's headed back to bethune and adi's heading home. my class isn't on tomorrow (thank god it's a terrible class) but I have to stay up as I am meeting people at 11:30 to work on a project. eh, no big deal really. holly is currently sleeping in my bed because she needed somewhere to sleep in, but I wouldn't be sleeping anyway. the sunrise will probably be within the next half-hour or so. in a bit of a sombre mood myself, pensive. I'm wanting to have a body more and more lately. as always, I use the most appropriate word; body instead of girlfriend. because what I really want to the largest degree is the immediate physicality. which is not something I can just get without the other too well. I don't know how, really. I'm not even very good at getting the one; how can I get the other? something. I know that others can explain it away, but I can't. I don't really want it for myself, besides. I want something better, something more. and I'm suffering a bit for it.

yeah. it's been increasing over the past few days. it's sad that it's happening; I don't normally go through things like this. not like this. other things, sometimes. mrlfram. I need some body.

it's not even that there aren't appealing ones or anything; I've actually seen a few girls I find rather attractive physically. but it's not really too much in the immediate moment (that problem again) so that I don't really act or anything, not that I know how to act or what to do or anything. god. things should be easier.
regaerkgbdvkurvsevirvkavkh. vgjh fgjxshygrweysfgj b,.

arg. siouxsie and the banshees on now. she's got a really unique voice. mm grak and filtz. snarble and I wish I had something. hrm. mrowlf. gabtzsl. framb.

scrabbled by james at 8:03 PM  
it's palindrome day today
t-minus four minutes and counting in this timezone
t-minus three minutes and counting

whee... at 8:02PM it'll be 20:02 20/02 2002
how exciting
a big deal for someone who finds 12:36 and 56 seconds a special time
t-minus 2 minutes
a time like this hasn't occurred since 11:11PM November 11, 1111
t-minus 1 minute

isn't the world such a special place sometimes?
I know I find it special very often.
like right now. it's special to the max.

AND IT's PALINDROME TIME!
YAY!!!!!

scrabbled by james at 1:59 AM  
yesh. hello evvybody. yeah, whoever stumbles across this from the "recently updated" list. if I'm lucky.

with regards to the last post, I was upset with stupid people that don't order more of something when the store they work at is out of it, despite it being brought to their attention that the store is out of it. and then tell ya that it'll be there in a few days. grr.

considering starting a livejournal because someone I know has one. apparently you need to be invited into the "family". so yeah. helen, can I have an invite...?

so then I'll have three things nobody reads (the other two being my webpage and this) and I'll feel even more extra special. whoo.

currently doing a series of pictures of a dinosaur. almost finished that, I think. hopefully everything'll turn out good. because good things are better than bad ones.

yesterday I found this great big various hacker speak and grammerical structure and personality and such, and I'm evidentally fairly hackerish despite my relative lack of programming knowledge. I use much of the same grammaticisms and theory behind my grammer, as well as many of the same (more sensical and less technical) terms, and fit about half or so of the "hacker personality" as they laid it out. plus, I own the first book listed in the bibliography, Douglas Hofstadter's Godel Escher Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid, and think it is one of the coolest books ever. so I'll just say I'm hacker lite. yeah. I'm cool.

and I can't think of what else at the moment. can't remember quite what I've put. so. yeah. I'll stop fer now.

scrabbled by james at 5:19 PM  
ahem.

I would just like to say fuck the world, fuck everybody, and all that because today has not been working out my way.

thank you. see you later.

scrabbled by james at 3:39 AM  
just changed a bit of layout. i.e. the little blog description.
because I feel the need to do that as often as possible.

oh, I keep them, though. I have a list.
I am so vain. yes!

on an entirely different note, it's reading week here. no classes is a good thing. because it means no classes, mostly. this is very inane right now. don't worry, that's not going to change any time soon.

listening to the one sabbath song I have on my computer. mostly because 1000 homo djs covered it. I know that I want to reach up and touch the sky. it looks a bit overcast right now, though. it was clear earlier. so clear. lots of stars visible, but a bit cool.

there's this book at my house with all sorts of tips and tricks on taking good photos, from this big series kodak did, at least in the seventies. they're my mom's books, but hey, most of the stuff is still applicable. things like "how to arrange a picture" and stuff like that. one of them has a piece on night-time photography. a long exposure can allow you to capture the rotation of the earth in comparison to the stars. they end up being little swirling lines, concentric circles around the pole. looks really neat when some scenery is captured as well.

the earth turns about 1 degree every 4 minutes.
1 rotation = 360 degrees.
360 x 4 = 1440 minutes.
1440 / 60 = 24 hours.

it's amazing how nicely that works out. makes you wonder, just how arbitrary is a 24 hour clock?

< warning; pointless math ahead. you may want to just skip down to the last post.>

so my theory is that the 24 hour clock was decided in correlation to the 360 degree circle.
24 hrs = 2 pi.
12 hrs = pi.
6 hrs = pi / 2.
4 hrs = pi / 3.
3 hrs = pi / 4.
2 hrs = pi / 6.
1 hr = pi / 12.
1/2 hr = pi / 24.
30 minutes = pi / 24.
1 minute = pi / 720.
now, the thing is, is that I'm pretty sure there are minutes in trigonometry. in radian measurement, rather. I can't really remember though. I don't remember if one minute is equal to pi / 720 in it, either.

so I'm doing some looking. according to this page on shooting reticles, 1 minute is 1 / 60th of a degree. so one degree = one hour. not the same as my logic, definitely. but anyway, that makes 360 degrees = 21600 minutes. so 2 pi = 21600 minutes; pi = 10800 minutes, and on to make one minute = pi / 10800. which is a hell of a lot less than pi / 720. which makes all of this useless garbage that I don't even remember too much what my point was. I don't know; I'm pedantic. once I get onto something I have to follow it through to its idiotic and pointless end.

and now that I've gotten as good as there, I'm going to end this.

scrabbled by james at 2:53 AM  
just felt like writing.
I'm vain. yeah, I know it.
not that that really has anything to do with anything.

scrabbled by james at 2:50 AM  
just responded to an email from tash.
ocad's not good for her. the people there are all very naive in their outlook and it's driving her insane. there's no one there with any understanding; no one she can talk to really. so I try to help, as best as I can. haven't seen her in person since late december. maybe we should try and meet up at somepoint; maybe that'd help to some degree.

I've been talking to her via email a lot more recently than I did for a while. hopefully it's been helping her, keeping her more sane. sanity is useful and I don't like to see her frustrated like that, but (this may sound twisted to some people, but I don't think it is) I'm glad that she's turning to me. I'm glad because that means she respects my opinion, which I already knew, and because it means she feels I might understand, which I do. I'm glad in that it means she values me. of course I'm not happy that she's having a hard time; I'd rather she was sending me happy messages instead of ones saying "no one understands me here; I used to think that I was pretentious but now I can see that I'm not in comparison to these people because I can at least back myself up," and other happy thoughts. the people there all want to be "misundertood, tormented artistes" without actually understanding what it is to be misunderstood or tormented in the way that comes with it. it's frustrating; I've been there. not due to my art; you rarely get there through your work. you get there through your ideas. and in order for that to happen you first have to have misunderstandable ideas. tash has those very much. she's a misunderstandable person in that she won't bullshit you. she'll tell you exactly what she thinks, be it what she thinks philosophically, politically, personally, or whatever. she's very straightforward and very critical. she is demanding, but worth it. she can be hard to deal with but she is very rewarding as well.

she's probably my best friend.



very few people can touch me as easily as she can. she has a lot of beauty inside her and I think one of the things that would make me happiest would be for her to be genuinely happy. the world is tough for her because she's so demanding. people don't put in the effort to be decent human beings, and then criticise her because she surpasses their low standards and refuses to accommodate them because they order her to. I have a lot of respect for her.

it'd be nice if she was happy.
god. if there was a world where she was happy all the time, if she was thoroughly satisfied with life and not having to deal with the idiotic strife of day-to-day life and its inhabitants, I'd never want to leave her because she would be so beautiful in that world.
that's why I went out with her for three years, and would have gone out with her longer if she had still been interested.
and that's why I still love her, and will always love her as long as she stays herself.
she is simply one of the most beautiful people I know.

she's so fucking gorgeous when she's happy.


--
certain people belong in a different world. I belong in a different world. and tash belongs in a different world.
and I'm thinking of the little prince now.

I wrote her a poem once called the fox and the little prince.

the little prince, by antoine de saint-exupéry. one of the most gorgeous books ever written. read it.

scrabbled by james at 3:56 AM  
just had an evening of hanging around with people I primarily didn't know who ended up being pretty cool. always good. and a few people I did. which is also good. so.

listening to elleinad. good sort of ambient electronic music got off of mp3.com. I can thank diesel sweeties for the introduction. good comics, and a good music recommendation as well. whee!

I certainly say "whee!" a lot.

and then there's the girl I'm interested in. I have no idea where I am with that anymore. I don't know if I'm still interested or not; I don't know what I'm doing with that at all any more. she's fun and adorable and I still think she's attractive; I just don't know if I'm still interested in that way anymore. so. it seems to me to be a post- starting-to-go-out emotion, where it's sort of comfortable, still enjoyable, but just not that initial surge any more. so I don't know where I'm gonna go with that. I don't know where I want to go with that.
and humidity is a damn good track. reminds me of another song but I can think quite what... hm.

in a good sort of relaxed good feeling and it's just... hmmm. a good hmmm. feeling very sensual and blissed (because it's a verb for me) and I may fall asleep at my computer at this nearly four-in-the-morning. not that I'm very tired, four being an average time for me to go to bed. just the sensual, blissful feeling can do that to you. it's a feeling that's very enjoyable, but gets you half-asleep. and the music's adding to it. go here to hear it for yourself. mmm good ambient sorta stuff mostly. but still interesting enough to hold up on its own. be good in a film, possibly. mmmm.

always feeling so much more sensual and wanting to deal with eroticism now. in my own way, though, not the fucking standard desperately overt ways commonly used. the above could be erotic, even. it's all about attitude, not events. and god do I love the right attitude. fucking sensual gorgeous. bjork is erotic. possibly maybe was one of the most erotic songs I had ever heard. then I got vespertine. god that album is so fucking good and so fucking erotic. she's so great. ahm fam snadulousnesty.

this one girl I met tonight is a fucking good dancer.

scrabbled by james at 9:48 PM  
making space on my computer... la la la

deleting junk, deleting junk. it's a song, it is.
whee.

sally's song from the nightmare before christmas is such a good song. tim burton is so good.






I have a lot of junk on here I don't care about.





and now I have about twice as much space as before. whee....

this is such a lacklustre post.

scrabbled by james at 12:23 AM  
i am fucking tired.
cumulative lack of sleep.
still i stay awake regardless.

lying back and a textbook is in my way. argle. I can't get quite comfortable.
shortly after midnight is a popular time for me to post.
but right now I feel like writing on paper.

scrabbled by james at 11:10 PM  
I demand everyone go here:

stan's room

now go!! GO!!!

scrabbled by james at 12:37 AM  
aggle facst tugboat monps.
what does this mean to you? tell me. of course, no one's going to, though. eh.

I've switched back to the normal windows explorer shell because litestep just didn't do it for me. you can decide for yourself if you like it; for now I don't. I also don't like that my computer keeps screwing up now, especially in relation to java stuff. grr computer.

I'm currently flipping through photos I've taken, and I've got a good amount. because photos are fun. I've got a Canon AE-1 Program, which allows me to take a lot nicer pictures now than I could before with my model-nameless Vivitar free-camera-from-some-promotion-with-Zellers that my parents got and gave to me. I still got interesting pics with that, because I am so good, but now I can take better ones that invovle things like "apeture", "shutter speed", and "focus". it's amazing how much better a picture can turn out when you have control of things. or even if you don't have control but they change to adapt to the situation. goddamn lousy tiny-apetured set-shutter-speed non-focusable camera. grr...

but yeah, I have some nice photos and I need to get some way to make them easier to look at than just flipping through a pile of them. I need to get a way to look at my pictures, in particular something where I can set aside the ones I like best and go, "oh yeah, I am so great." et cetera. I certainly tell myself that I'm great a lot.

the reason I was looking through my photos was because I have a painting project that I don't know what it is exactly but I need six textures to my understanding and I was trying to see if I could find some. what I've found are some interesting things that I probably wouldn't really consider textures but I might be able to get away with using them. I don't know for certain; as I've said, I'm a bit lost on the assignment topic/idea/whatever. so yeah, that's fun.

and then I have two freakin' essay proposals due thursday and friday. yay fun for that. the first one I can bullshit something easily, but the second I actually have to do an annotated bibliography for and have all sorts of guidelines and crap and I really don't want to do it. stupid fucking class. mandatory classes that are crap suck.

so yeah. but I like looking at my pictures anyway. and I'm rather tired on the inside and my friends think I've gone insane due to lack of sleep. it's fun to play with that. wheee!
I like looking at my pictures. I have some nice ones to look at, and some nice ones with nice people to look at too. mmm. I'm such a ridiculous boy sometimes. (and does that ever feel like an odd thing to say).

... dot.



. (dot.)

scrabbled by james at 2:59 AM  
so here's my news.
I've installed a new shell for windows, litestep. this makes windows look different. it apparently can make it better, but so far it's been pretty non-eventish. yes windows looks different. but is it better?
.... not particularly, in my opinion. there's a few things that are different, but mostly it's pretty the same. and if something isn't pretty the same it's something like feeling like a feature is missing. so whoo.

really, the primary difference is that this is customisable. but the customisations really only seem to be cosmetic. you can apparently add in modules and such to get more spiffy things, but I've never been a huge module or plug-in person. I'll try it out for a bit longer, I guess, and see what else I can do with it, but right now I'm not that impressed, really. I don't know.
but anyway, it's three am and I have 9:30 class tomorrow. whee for lack of sleep and things.

scrabbled by james at 6:25 PM  
saw jello biafra last night. six hours of spoken word. I'm astounded that a person could be able to talk for six hours without running out of things to say or having it be all stuttered or anything. and then keep it entertaining as well. whee!

I don't agee with everything he said, but I agreed with a lot of it. it's the sort of left-wing politics I approve of, as it's rational and thought out and realistic, as opposed to the more-common reactionary zealotry. go jello for thinking things through and getting real information about things!

that being said, one thing I disagree with is the "horrors" of globalisation (a subject which was only touched upon in brief). I personally don't think globalisation is a bad thing; in fact, I think that globalisation can lead to a fairer and more equal world with less poverty, etc. of course, I don't mean in the way it is typically being done at the moment; a lot of what is being done at the moment is useless gibberish. but if a system is put in place that is more efficient and better organised, then I doubt anyone will have a problem with globalisation, really.

this is why I don't necessarily hate the IMF.
the IMF realises that it's not as efficient as it could be, and is actually trying to make itself work in a way that assists countries in need, as opposed to being a lackey for western feudalism, to use the popular terminology. I can respect that. they realise that they could be doing a better job at assisting poor countries, and are trying to do so. I cannot make any comment on the world bank, as I am not familiar with it, but I know the IMF is behaving this way. and I know it's not perfect, and I know it's often causing harm, but instead of opposing it, I think that what needs to be done is to make it better. people are so quick to declare things "the enemy" and deciding that it should therefore be destroyed without analysing it and saying, "this could be a good thing, if we improved it." because the goal of the IMF is to help impoverished countries, which is what all those who declare it the enemy also want. so instead of trying to have it eliminated, people should try to have it reformed. if you have a problem with the way it works, write to your country's finance minister or treasurer; they're a member of it. if you've got a really big problem, write to the united state's treasurer. he has essentially veto power over anything, which is one thing that should be changed. (how, you might ask? voting shares in the IMF are done on a basis of how much each country contributes to the world economy - or something similar, I can't remember exactly - and this gives the USA about 25% of the voting power. for the majority of the votes in the IMF, there has to be an 85% majority, if I'm remembering correctly, which gives the US veto power. the next largest share is about 6% or so, by something like the UK or france. that number may not be completely accurate, but it's much less than the states. I believe there's something like over 150 countries in the IMF, and the G7 (G8? I can't remember...) has about 50-60% of the voting power.... check for yourself. go to the IMF page, I found all the numbers on a chart there about a year ago... they should probably still be pretty accurate, though). and if these people have intelligible pressure put upon them, as opposed to rioting in the streets and cries of "down with the IMF" and such, they'll be more likely to respond favourably. do research, and present your research. it works better than screaming and waving signs. plus, you'll get more respect in the way you're handled, and you'll probably learn something too. research is good when picking things to protest about. always research them for yourself, I say; don't just take one person's viewpoint and say they're right, take their viewpoint and any others you can find, then go to the sources and make up your own mind. that's what I did, and why I don't think the IMF is evil, but instead that it needs to be fixed to a degree. to take something that jello said (though not these words, exactly), extremism leads to burnout; go only about 75% of the way in fervour and you'll keep your idealism. go all the way, you'll be full-on for about a year, maybe, then burn out and revert to the opposite in disappointment, a need to relax, anything. jello probably doesn't like the IMF too much, though. but as I've been saying, it's about sharing the same goals. if the popular path isn't the best one, convince them to change paths as opposed to telling them they're not allowed to walk it as well. besides, if the IMF isn't walking that path, then, to my knowledge, the world bank is the only organisation that I know of still set up to assist impoverished countries, though I'm not completely certain if that's actually what it's there for; as I said, I haven't done that research. go to the world bank and find out. the slogan on the site, though is "our dream is a world free of poverty", though I only went ot it for a second; I know nothing about it really. my view of the world bank, though, is a little more dim, based on the bits I've heard, but again, don't take my word for it, decide for yourself. and my point here was, that if we eliminate all the organisations set up to assist these countries, then we have to start up new organisations all over when it probably would be more efficient to transform the old ones into better ones. so yeah.

that was a long paragraph.

on another note, I saw my friend nick at the show last night for the first time since... last july, maybe? a good long while. it was good to see him again. yeah. things. maybe I'll post more later; I feel like stopping for now, actually. hopefully my views up there were coherent and don't result in angry emails (hah! like anyone still visits the site... I've had about 20-something visits since I put on the sitemeter counter in... november? and about half of those at least are me... whee!). hm. I guess I'm just more concerned about my friends possibly visiting and reading this and misinterpreting my thoughts. things? words. stuff. yeah. I can be as intelligible as ever.